imperfect perfection

i shared how excited i was last week when serendipity stepped in and handed me the gift of a polaroid camera loaded with film.
the camera was not the gift, but rather the film inside...film that was still viable.
well;), in some shape and form.

now, the photos it produces are in no way perfect. there is a random amount of actual image that has been appearing. a small part of the image. and i have found this ridiculously endearing.
and somehow, on the beach, in the sunshine last friday, i feel like i caught the perfect moment with the most imperfect of mediums.

the big kids were back at school and the little guy and i were hanging out.
there is major construction about to happen on the causeway to our home, so i decided to head out with the baby to see if we could see any big "whoa's" ( his word for trucks ).
he was a little cranky ( no idea he would sprout a HUGE fever later that evening ), so i loaded up on "puppy nums" ( fruity scooby snacks...get it? scooby=puppy and snacks=nums? he may not say much, but he is succint with his words;)) and cameras and took off with him in the stroller.

we walked up to the top of the road and there were no whoa's to be had.
not a one.
the kinda cranky baby became a definite cranky boy.

so, i broke through the "do not enter" barrier, with the stroller ( okay, just circumnavigated it a bit ) and took a detour to the beach.

i always carry an assortment of hot wheels and toy trucks on me these days, so we just plunked down on the near deserted beach, and set up to play. and by deserted, i mean aside from one jumping fish,  forty geese and one partially submerged picnic table, we were it for beach visitors.

alex was completely engrossed in his play, alternating between sitting in the sand, making roads with his vehicles, and walking to the lake to throw rocks and trucks into the water and retrieve them. i don't think we said four words to each other for three quarters of an hour, him playing and me just enjoying his contented state of being.

since he absolutely does not acknowledge my cameras any more, i have little fear of distracting him from whatever he is busy doing...he either ignores me, intentionally looks away, or tries (to my dismay) to enmesh my camera into whatever vehicular play he is creating.
on this beautiful sunshine filled end of summer day, he ignored me.

even the whirring of my polaroid did not entreat him to turn around to see what i was doing...he was just absolutely happy to be him in the sun at that moment.
with his trucks.
and his soggy rolled pants.
and his sandy feet.
with me.

and i took complete selfish advantage of that lovely moment by snapping the two shots i have shared here.

and i am so happy i did because in thirty years...fifty years, i will look at those photos, as bizarre as they are and i will remember the absolute joy and luck i felt to be me at that very moment.
perfection in imperfection.
it is a pretty cool thing.