and that is a okay with me:)
miss lydia ( my young photog friend from post two or three ) has created a bit of a sensation for herself amongst the hundreds of teens on her fb page with her 365.
in other photo news, i shot my first pre prom preparations ever.
and it was fun.
more than fun, it was wonderful.
i was a little wiggy about it at first...because i am still unsure about the shooting for money idea
(although, in full disclosure, this was a total freebie - i would not have thought of charging for it. these are friends. oooops. i can hear the ottawa flickr group screaming right now at that statement. i just broke some pro photogs business in half right there).
i keep thinking that deep down the only thing that will make me happy is to shoot for myself, when i want and how i want. the idea of somehow being beholden to someone else for the results of "my" photos bothers me. and stresses me out. and makes me not want to take pictures.
but then, when i started taking pics yesterday afternoon, surrounded by a gaggle of parents and grandparents and sisters...it didn't matter. the only thing that was in my head was "holy shit. i got her. i gotherigotherigother!!!!!" and by that i mean, despite my initial anxiety, i was able to capture exactly who i know this kid to be:).
and that made me ridiculously happy.
i ran home, like a 5 year old, to load my shots...i was late picking holly up from school because i could just not leave the screen. so, um, yeah, maybe i can get my head around shooting for others...just maybe. or maybe i just really have to take pictures of people i like. would that be wrong?
i am just rambling...but i am at such a crossroads as to what to do, it is insane. i have the time. i have the tools. i have the technology. but deciding what and how to do it is just proving to be huge for me. i just need to decide already. there was other stuff as well this week. i had lunch with the director of the art gallery yesterday and she filled my head with several ideas...i mustered up the courage to speak to someone else today about exhibiting my work and was well received...i need to prepare 20 prints and frame them for a hanging for september. i need a website. i need more business cards.
man have i got stuff to do.